Hello readers. I hope you’re all doing well .😊
I hope this account of my brief journey to another realm helps those whom are grieving for a loved one who has passed over.

In 1993, my partner, my best friend and my love, died.

His name was Julian. Jay, for short. He was a troubled guy but had a very good heart.

For the rest of my life, I will never forget the day that I learned of Jay’s death.

I returned from the forest close by to my house and where I had been collecting firewood. My friend Mark and his partner, Ian, were sitting on my doorstep awaiting my return. Baring in mind, this was 25 years ago and mobile phones hadn’t been invented, they hadn’t been able to let me know quickly of their visit and I also didn’t have a landline phone either!

I saw them and wondered why they were there. As I approached, they both stood up and I saw immediately the grave look on their faces. Despite that though, I was very happy to see them. They treated me very gently and refused at first to explain their reasons for being at my house. They just said for me to come inside and they’d explain everything.

They sat me down and told me that Jay had died.

I went into shock and then stood up and tried to start cleaning my house, but they stopped me and asked me, very gently, to look for his families phone numbers as they needed to be informed.

I did this, phone calls were made, a funeral was arranged and my sister came down to stay with me.

At the funeral, I was so distressed, family and friends were afraid that I would tried to throw myself into the grave hole and people had to hold me back. I realise that sounds very dramatic. But it was a very dramatic time.

My beautiful sisters wouldn’t hear of me being alone to care for my two children and so they stepped in as best they could. Firstly, we went to stay at my sisters house in London for a week and then the children and I flew to America to stay with my eldest sister for six weeks.

Whilst I was staying in London, I experienced a divinely beautiful visit to heaven. The world of death. The after life. And I met Jay.

It wasn’t a dream. I had been alive on this planet for 23 years by this time and I know what a dream is. And besides, I experienced many, many grief fraught dreams in the months following Jay’s death and, believe me, this wasn’t a dream.

Here is the account of my beautiful experience.

I was sat in pure whiteness. A pure light so bright that in ordinary circumstances it would be too blinding for the naked human eye. When I say I sat, I mean just that. I was sitting with my legs tucked underneath me. There was no floor, nor ceiling, no walls. Just whiteness, everywhere.

The feeling of love, everywhere, was sublime. There was no feeling of anything bad, it was just purely and simply pure, unconditional love. Nothing was wrong in that moment. Or any moment. All was just as it was. Unless one has experienced this feeling of sublime love, it literally cannot be explained by writing. It is beyond any vocabulary. It is not of this physical, 3D realm.

I sat in this pure love whiteness and ahead of me I saw a figure emerging out of nowhere but from a very long way away, all at the same time. It was Jay. He walked towards me in his usual jeans and t- shirt. In this physical realm my heart ached for him, uncontrollably, day and night. But in this beautiful spiritual realm, there was no longing. No heartache. We were both shrouded in this beautiful, unconditional love light and I felt happy.

Jay walked toward me and sat directly opposite me. We stared at one another and smiled. We stayed like that, just sitting and smiling and then he ‘spoke’ to me, telepathically. He told me that he was fine. That he was now safe, that everything was beautiful and that I had nothing to be worried about.

It was sublime.

And then he stood up and without a backwards glance, he walked away. As I say, in the months following Jay’s return to Source, I experienced many horrific dreams where I would wake up crying and searching for him in my mind and feeling hopeless and desperate that he was gone. But as I watched Jay walk away in the light, I felt no urge to jump up and run after him and tell him not to go, to please stay. I felt nothing but love and purity of spirit. I felt happy.

When I awoke the following morning, I immediately remembered our beautiful experience and was filled with peace. I said to myself, ‘I saw Jay last night. I actually met with Jay’. And I knew this to be true.

Over the past 25 years, I have told this story to quite a few people. There are those who are skeptical and question wether it was just a dream. A dream filled by a deep, grief filled desire to see Jay again. And there are those who believe also that I had indeed met Jay in his spirit dimension and that he had spoken with me.

I feel very blessed to have experienced many moments of grace in my life and now that I have the time to write, I look forward to sharing many more of those experiences with you.

Love
Heidi xx